Imagine your life as a teapot, sitting on the stove, slowly filling up with steam. At first, everything is manageable. The water simmers, and the steam rises gently. But over time, the heat intensifies. The pressure builds. You feel it accumulating in every part of you—your thoughts race, your heart pounds, your body tenses. You’re holding it all together, trying to contain that mounting stress, but the whistle looms closer.
I often use that analogy when coaching leaders. I had a coaching session with a young pastor yesterday, and his words triggered me to write this. We had ordered our coffee and sat down to connect. He started by saying that when we met the last time, he felt like he was that teapot and the whistle was screaming for help before exploding. He then began to share that after sharing his heart or letting out some of the steam, he felt different and that the last two weeks had been much better concerning that area. He went on to say, “You didn’t even really say anything. You just listened, and as I processed my thoughts and words, I felt relief.”
In many ways, stress works like that teapot. Small things in life—work deadlines, family responsibilities, personal expectations—start as manageable water drips. But when enough of those drips collect, and the heat of pressure rises, the steam builds. Left unchecked, you’re headed for an inevitable boil-over.
Much like a teapot can’t endlessly hold in steam without releasing it, neither can we. The problem isn’t just the heat or the water; it’s what happens when there’s no release valve. When we let the stress accumulate, we become that whistling teapot on the verge of boiling over.
The internal pressure manifests in various ways—anxiety, irritability, lack of focus, and sometimes even physical symptoms like headaches or fatigue. And just like that teapot on the stove, without a way to cool down or release some of the steam, we risk overflowing, crashing under the weight of our stress. Typically, when it boils over, it’s not always pretty. Things can be done and said that on a normal day would never be shared. Decisions made in moments like these are always risky.
Every teapot has a whistle to signal when it’s reached its limit, a way to let off steam. We, too, need those outlets in life.
1. Pause and Breathe: Just like turning down the heat on the stove, taking time to breathe deeply and pause can help lower the pressure.
2. Let It Out: Whether it’s through journaling, venting to a friend, or finding a creative outlet, express what’s bubbling beneath the surface. For me, I like to get outside to walk or run.
3. Mindful Moments: Practice mindfulness or prayerful moments to bring awareness to your stress and find calm in the chaos. There is nothing like His presence to relieve some pressure.
4. Take Breaks: Just as a teapot is removed from heat to cool down, step away from stressful situations to give yourself a breather.
5. Prioritize Self-Care: Recognize when you’re nearing your limit and practice regular self-care—whether that’s through exercise, hobbies, or simply resting.
Life is full of stressful moments. As a leader, we will always have stress. That means we are doing something. We can’t stop the water from boiling, but we can learn how to manage the heat. We are all like teapots, and the goal isn’t to avoid the stress entirely. Instead, it’s about finding healthy ways to release the steam before we reach the boiling point.
So, when you feel life’s pressure building, remember: it’s okay to let off some steam. It’s essential. Maybe it’s time to learn from my client. Find a listening ear, a safe place, where the pressure will not be judged, but rather allowed to be released so you as the leader can lead from a place of health.
