Failure can be crippling. But the fear of failure keeps us from living our best lives. I’ve spent a lifetime not attempting things because I might fail. I attempted some sports as a kid, but soon realized that was not my strength. Yes, I was picked close to the end of most pickup games! No need to feel sorry for me. It helped define my gifts and abilities. Many times we do not use failure as a step to growth but rather live with these symptoms controlling our minds and behavior.
Disappointment: Feeling let down or discouraged by the outcome, especially when it falls short of your expectations. Disappointment can then lead to not trying again. I recently heard on a podcast that the average toddler falls 17 times per hour! Guess what? They got back up. They didn’t remain in their disappointment or accept the lie that they would never walk.
Frustration: A sense of annoyance or irritation due to not achieving your goals or objectives.
Timing is everything and typically our timing is a drive-through mentality, which used to be fast. When it’s not, we get upset and our day is shot.
Self-Doubt: Questioning your abilities, decisions, or self-worth in the wake of failure. Many of us have spent a lifetime with doubting being the topic of our self-talk! What if we fail?
Sadness: Feeling a sense of sadness or grief, particularly if the failure was related to a significant personal or professional goal. In all honesty, over the last few weeks, I have struggled with this. Only because my recent plans have not gone at the speed I thought they would. So to combat that, every morning I get up and recognize I have a choice. I can stay stuck in my sadness or I can get in action and be one step closer to my dreams.
Stress and Anxiety: Increased stress or anxiety levels as a result of the perceived negative consequences of failure. Too much of this leads to an unhealthy lifestyle.
Anger: Feeling angry, either at yourself or others, for the perceived causes of the failure. Our world is full of angry people, all because things have not gone as planned.
Fear of Judgment: Worrying about how others will perceive you or fearing judgment and criticism from others because of your failure. I have allowed this one trait to control my life in so many ways. Over the last couple of years, I’ve identified it and begun to lessen its control.
Loss of Motivation: Finding it difficult to stay motivated or set new goals after experiencing failure. Why try? So we binge-watch and scroll!
Physical Symptoms: Sometimes, failure can manifest in physical symptoms like headaches, stomachaches, or sleep disturbances due to the stress and emotional turmoil it can cause.
Avoidance Behavior: Avoiding situations or tasks that remind you of your failure can hinder personal growth and progress. The ceiling is set way too low.
It can also be a valuable learning experience, helping you grow, adapt, and develop resilience. How you respond to failure and the lessons you draw from it can determine your future success. Make a decision today to let failure propel you ahead to where you want to be. Stop being picked last!
